Portland Area Real Estate Appraisal Discussion

Funny Portland Oregon Appraiser Story
June 24th, 2014 4:19 PM

If you ever find yourself among a group of real estate appraisers, you will usually hear someone recount a humorous tale. Typical home appraiser stories range from bazar things seen in homes to attack by animals. My experiences include goats and other farm animals living inside homes, nude paintings of the homeowners (reminiscent of the famous George Costanza Timeless Art of Seduction pose), accessing vacant properties by climbing through second-story windows, lots of cats, hoarder homes, shock by electric fences, animal feces in places it should not be, inspecting the interior of the wrong house (not my fault), tiptoeing around a backyard rabbit hospital so as not to disturb the cardiac patients, pursuit by homeowners who saw me take a comparable photo of their house, and run ins with all manner of animals including dogs, cats, bees, snakes, llamas, and horses.

Portland Home Appraiser Stories


One of my favorite yarns involves a narrow escape from animal attack. I was appraising a property in a rural area near Portland, Oregon about four years ago. A horse pasture was located at the rear of the property. I had been taking photos of the front of the house and decided to get a rear photo. Around the house I went, with an electronic tape measure in one hand, a tablet computer over my shoulder, and a camera in my other hand. To get the best photo of the house, I had to walk by a detached garage, past a vacant chain-link dog kennel, and into the pasture that included horses on the far side of the field.

The best spot for the photo was between the kennel and the pasture. I started to take a picture but turned around to see a large black horse on a deliberate and accelerating trot aimed directly at me. The horse was not galloping, but it was coming faster than I can run and its head was positioned in a most unwelcoming manner. Ears back and nostrils flared, the head looked more like an angry bull than the typical friendly horses I’ve seen on other appraisal assignments.

There was no time to run; I just had to get into the vacant dog kennel. I don’t remember if I cleared the fence in one leap or if I used a foothold. I just know that I made it at the moment the aggressive horse reached the fence. A moment later, I heard the sound of a snarling dog slowly moving out of a doghouse at the other end of the kennel.

After leaping over the only reaming safe side of the enclosures, I finished the exterior appraisal inspection. My computer was unharmed and so was I. While viewing the interior of the home, I pretended nothing had happened, but my heart rate did not go down until I was driving home. Now when I think back, I wonder if the owner had watched me from the kitchen window as I first escaped from their horse and then from their dog. If so, they probably got more laughs out of what they saw than I did.

Portland Home in Appraisal


Above is a side view of the Portland home I was appraising. In the photo, you can see part of the dog kennel behind the detached garage. The thing is — I never did get the rear photo of the house to use in the appraisal or to share in this blog. Consequently, I learned that appraisers should always ask homeowners to control any animals (even though they usually say that the animals are friendly) and appraisers need to make sure that distractions do not make them forget important things for the appraisal, including a rear photo.

If you have any humorous real estate appraiser stories, please consider sharing them in the comments section below this blog. If you find this information interesting or useful, please subscribe to my blog. Also, please support us by making Portland real estate appraisal related comments on our blogs and YouTube videos. If you need Portland, Oregon area residential real estate appraisal services for any reason, please contact us. We will do everything possible to assist you.

Thanks for reading,


That's a great story! I hope I never have to go through something like that. I'd much rather hear a story like this, than live through a story like this.

Posted by lucaswarren@comcast.net on June 25th, 2014 2:59 PM
Very funny story. I have one can share with you, it was my first day on the job as a property manager. The owner of this property had recently acquired it and the bank held some money back in escrow for the removal of a metal storage tank. So he hires this welder to cut it managable pieces in order to get it through the door. As I leave him to work so I can do other things around the property I see a plume of smoke through a window from the area the welder was working. As I see it I think OMG the building is on fire. As I'm running to the welder he's running out and we collide like in an episode of the 3 stooges. Fortunately for us he had the state of mind to throw something on the fire to put it out otherwise it would've been an extremely bad day. In the end it all worked out, we accomplished what we need to do and the building didn't burn down. It's one of my favorite real estate stories to tell. Portland Appraisers have some interesting thins to contend with.

Posted by John on June 25th, 2014 4:28 PM
Great appraiser story John! Thank you for sharing.

Posted by Gary Kristensen on June 25th, 2014 6:27 PM


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